


In Which Ishimaru Survives

by LollyHolly99



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Angst, F/F, Feelings Realization, Flashbacks, Hurt/Comfort, Love Confessions, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Universe Alteration, general Danganronpa 1 spoilers, making my precious boy feel sad bc i can't help myself, probably fucking up Japanese name usage whoops
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-07
Updated: 2018-01-16
Packaged: 2019-03-01 22:02:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 7,119
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13304208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LollyHolly99/pseuds/LollyHolly99
Summary: Ishimaru swallowed, unable to look the girl in the eye. "Why... why make me a scapegoat? Why not... kill me outright? Why not me in place of Hagakure?"---Inspired by a comment I saw somewhere lamenting that Ishimaru died in chapter 3 after all that unfinished character development and saying that he should've maybe lived in place of Hagakure.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hopy shit lolly finally writes something that doesn't indulge her skeleton-fucker side!! Unfortunately it's for an obsession that has returned to me that has taken over my life this past month or two whoops. enjoying something in moderation? not for me.  
> I hope to god? this turned out ok?? who knows I just got smacked with the inspiration stick again while I was back at school so I had to barf 2000-ish words out  
> anyways hope y'all enjoy!! <3  
> (also fUCK it's another fic I've started without finishing any of my others I just cAN'T HELP MYSELF I'M SORRY ;;; )

"Ya-Yasu...hi...ro..."

The other students watched on in shock as Yamada died, right before their eyes. They'd seen death before, yes, too many times, but seeing his eyes close, never to open again, as his head lay in Asahina's arms, was different somehow.

And to top it off, what seemed like the simplest way to find the truth behind the murder had gone wrong. Why had he said the victim's name when he said he would reveal the culprit? "Yasuhiro"? But Hagakure was dead himself!

* * *

"I'm telling you, it was not me! I would never do such a thing! I-"

"All the evidence points to you, Ishimaru." Celestia interrupted, calm as ever. "Plans, obviously used for that costume, the materials used in making it, all found in your room... and no alibi. That sounds more than conclusive, does it not?"

"N-no! I don't know where that came from! Y-you all have to believe me, please, I w-would never... I would never kill anybody!"

* * *

"I must say, once again, you succeeded wonderfully! Today's culprit... The true culprit who manipulated everything..."

The bear paused, leaving the eight of them in suspense, even though every one of them knew the truth at this point. He grinned wider, and the left side of his mouth showed off once again those sharp fangs.

"...was Celestia Ludenberg! A-K-A Taeko Yasuhiro!"

* * *

"Yesterday evening, right after we finished our discussion about where that thing disappeared to, I came visiting Yamada's room..."

Celestia - or rather, Taeko - recounted her manipulation of Yamada to the group. How she'd convinced him to turn on Ishimaru, with a photo of "that" in the prefect's room, telling him they'd escape together after killing Hagakure, faking Yamada's death, and framing Ishimaru as the culprit.

"He, of course, wanted Ishimaru dead, having learnt about his supposed thievery of that thing, but I proposed that it would hurt him more to frame him and have everyone turn on him when he knew full well he hadn't committed the crime. Or perhaps, when he awoke in the locker, he'd be out of his odd state and believe he did, in fact, kill them while not in his right state of mind."

The gambler looked up thoughtfully. "He didn't even stop to think twice. Heh, that thing had power over him. The power of love... even if that love is a twisted one, it sure can control people."

"That... That was... a devious trick..." Ishimaru said, voice shaking with disbelief.

"There's something I want to ask. Was that strange costume Yamada's work?" Togami questioned.

Celestia nodded. "Yes. That was unfortunate. All I asked him for was something that can hide a face and posture, but he came up with that ridiculous thing. Agreeing to use it was a mistake on my part."

Ishimaru swallowed, unable to look the girl in the eye. "Why... why make me a scapegoat? Why not... kill me outright? Why not me in place of Hagakure?"

Celestia shrugged. "It is just how the plan formed, I suppose. It certainly helped convince Yamada, the prospect of you suffering rather than simply killing you by his own hand."

"How... I... I cannot believe Yamada would be so cruel..."

"Well, it is as I said before: love can control absolutely. I just happened to be the one to give his own love that push it needed."

* * *

Celestia's execution was over. The ultimate gambler had finally lost a bet - her most risky one yet - for the first time in a long, long time.

It never got easier, having to see their friends kill and be killed. Coming across bodies, being forced to watch the horrifying executions... They were all so different, but all oh so much the same. Dread. _Despair_. Fear. **Despair**. Anguish. **_Despair despair despair_**.

There was little more for the classmates to say to eachother after that. They did, however, all agree together (discretely, so as not to arouse suspicion in front of the cameras) who should go check on "that" before they all went their separate ways, having been given a parting gift from Celestia.

Alter Ego.

Ishimaru was slightly relieved for it to have been Kirigiri and Naegi who checked in with the AI. Of course, he likely wouldn't have been allowed to anyway, if he offered, but had he gone in and seen that face on the laptop, almost perfectly resembling Fujisaki's...

...Or, especially, if they had imitated Mondo again...

...He didn't know what he'd do.

The images flashed before him again, of Fujisaki's body, the person he couldn't believe Mondo had killed.

Of the pain in his expression as the truth of the boy's murder was revealed, as Ishimaru sobbed and wailed, clutching that black overcoat, because _no, it couldn't be, he wouldn't do that, why would he do that, how could he have done that?!_

Of his fear that showed in those violet eyes as he was forcibly dragged to his execution, placed on his usual vehicle of choice, and sent into that cage.

Around and around the biker had gone, becoming a blur amongst the gaudy bright lights and decorations at the speed he was forced around at. Round and round, again and again; it felt like it had taken forever when the bike finally came to a stop, and that machine dispensed the plastic tub of... of...

...Ishimaru was going to throw up.

The dizzying memories and the stress of this "game" got to him as he was making his way back to his room, and he threw his hand to his mouth, stumbling and placing his other hand on the bright red wall beside him to stabilise himself.

"Ishimaru!" Asahina called from not too far behind him, rushing over with Sakura in tow. "A-are you okay there?" She put a reassuring hand on his shoulder, and he looked up and over at the swimmer.

"Y-yes, thankyou, Asahina, just... just fine."

"Are you sure?" she pressed. "You don't look so good..."

"There is no need to pretend, Ishimaru, we are all struggling right now." Sakura added.

His gaze dropped. "I... I dont know..."

Asahina turned to Sakura. "Could you get us all some protein, please, Sakura? I'll get him to his room."

The fighter nodded and headed off for the storage room.

"It's... kinda the cheaper sort of stuff, but, hey, it's something! You'll be feeling right as rain in no time, the stuff can still do wonders! I..."

Ishimaru couldn't listen to her rambling about protein as she helped him walk to the dorms, all too caught up in remembering him.

They quickly reached his room.

"Do you need help with your key, or..."

"No, I can handle that. Thankyou, Asahina."

He opened up the door, and Asahina followed him over to the bed, where she sat next to him.

"There. Now you just gotta rest."

"Y-yes, of course. Thankyou."

He paused, but forced himself to speak again, lest he become entirely choked up again thinking about Mon-

 _Things_.

"I-I think I'll be fine now, Asahina. You needn't burden yourself with me anymore. I was simply having a funny five minutes, I suppose."

The concern on Asahina's face grew. "I mean, I would, but... no offense, Ishimaru, but you still look pretty bad. I wanna know for sure that you're okay."

He didn't fight her on that. He couldn't right now. She could be particularly determined sometimes, and it seemed right now was shaping up to be one of said times.

"So, uh, anyways, can you tell me what's wrong?"

Ishimaru hesitated.

"Stomach problems." he stated simply. "I... felt for a moment back there that I would vomit."

Well, it wasn't really a lie.

"That's all?" Asahina questioned.

"Yes," he assured, definitely lying. "I suppose I ate something my stomach didn't agree with, or-"

"Or you thought about... Mondo... too hard, right?"

The prefect was taken aback by her all too accurate suggestion, gazing wide-eyed at her. With a sigh, he looked down at the floor, fighting the tears threatening to form in his eyes. "That was mightily deductive, Asahina."

She gave a soft smile to the boy. "It happens sometimes."

When she placed a hand on Ishimaru's lap, taking him by surprise, he looked up, his weary eyes meeting her bright, yet worried, gaze.

"I understand how you're feeling, Ishimaru. i get that you're still torn up about him. It's okay to feel that way."

He let the tears finally spill at that. "I-I... I m-miss..."

At his hesitation, Asahina moved her hand to his back, rubbing it in an attempt to comfort him. "Shh, sorry, don't force yourself to speak if you can't. I know."

Her eyes turned up to the ceiling as she thought, frowning now.

"I get it. I feel the same way about Sakura. I... I don't know what I'd do if she... if she died. But I do know it'd kill me inside. I know I'd feel exactly how you're feeling. And I know it's gotta suck, feeling like this."

Ishimaru's thoughts turned bitter for a moment. _Sakura is alive. How could she know? How could she understand?_

His own mind disgusted him. How could he think such things?! His classmate was doing her best to comfort him, and there he was, silently criticising her because of something neither she nor her best friend were responsible for.

"It's hard. I know. My biggest fear right now is that she'll end up... l-like he did, or something." She suddenly took his hand again, clasping it within both of hers this time.

"But... he's still with you, Ishimaru!" she said, the spark back in her eyes once more, surprising him once more until she spoke again. "In spirit!"

His face fell again. "But... he's not really here..."

"Like heck he isn't! Don't you remember when you got all weird and fired up? Y'know, when you kept yelling 'I'm me!' and all that?"

"...Not entirely."

"Well, maybe I just spent too long around... uh, Hagakure..." She paused for a second at the mention of their now dead classmate. "...but... that was totally him! It had to be!"

He paused for a second, taking a deep breath. "You really think so?"

"Mhm! And you wanna know what else I think?"

"What?"

"I think... he'd want you to be happy. Even if he's gone. He'd want you to keep going."

And with that, Ishimaru broke. He hugged his knees to his chest, dropped his head and sobbed loudly.

Asahina gasped. "O-oh my gosh, Ishimaru, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you! I just thought that might make you feel better! I-"

He put up a hand, interrupting her, and wiped away his tears with his sleeve. His throat hurt, but after a few moments, he spoke anyway, through the faded sobs that had turned to sniffling. "N-no, it's fine... that very much helped. I... I had forgotten this whole time to consider that he may have wanted that. Thankyou." With considerable effort, he brought his head up, smiling as best he could at the swimmer.

She smiled softly again at him. "Anytime."

Sakura arrived then, carrying drinks for the three of them. As Asahina ran over to collect hers and the prefects, he couldn't stop thinking about what she'd said.

_" **He'd** want you to be **happy**."_

It repeated in his head like a mantra, and he let it, trying his hardest to make it take over every despairing thought he had.

_" **He'd** want you to **keep going**."_

He was, good god, he was, and he'd keep on keeping on going - like hell he was gonna give up yet!

He felt a spark inside him. It was familiar.

_**Me.** _

...

He forced it down, forced it to stay calm for now. He didn't have it in him to be able to mentally black out for a handful of days again. Not now. He was sure these two wouldn't appreciate it, as well.

The two girls stayed with him for a while that evening, comforting him even in their own shaken states after the day's events. He was extremely grateful for them spending their time with him. However, if there was a next time, he'd forego the protein drink. It was a kind gesture, yes, but it just... wasn't to his tastes.

Soon enough, Sakura and Asahina went to leave, to go back to their own dorm rooms for night-time. As they said their goodbyes, and the girls exited, Asahina turned back for a second.

"Hey, Ishimaru? Don't forget, you've got friends all around you, okay? You can always come to us if you need."

Ishimaru nodded. "Thankyou."

Another bright smile from Asahina, and a wave, and the girls were gone.

...Friends... They were his friends. Everyone. Not just classmates. He had friends? He had friends.

For the first time ever, he had someone - multiple people, even - that he could call friends.

...Well, not the first time... but now wasn't the time to dwell on that! He'd just been cheered up - he was done with crying today!

In fact, he was done with today entirely. He was going to go to sleep. A few minutes later, having gotten ready for bed, he drifted off, with Mondo's voice in his head.

_"Keep goin', bro."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *prays this shit isn't ooc as hell, as I always do*  
> I was originally only gonna write a lil bit but whoops another multi-chapter fic bc more ideas so here we go on another adventure!!! of Ishimondo-based angst!!!  
> also ughhh I'm not too happy w/ the ending of this chapter but oh well I guess I'll eat it w/ crackers bc it feels like cheese  
> anyways yell at me @ lollyholly99.tumblr.com I need friends  
> <3


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a fun new day.  
> Ishimaru has a realisation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> back again, nerds, with more 50% of an ishimondo!!  
> I should rename this fic "I can't stop hurting my precious boy please send help. also everyone is over-emotional"  
> enjoy <3

Today was a "don't want to get up" kind of day for Ishimaru. He didn't quite understand why, it just was.

Being the model student that he was, it was unheard of for him to not wake up when his morning alarm went off. As of right now, the Monokuma announcement was his alarm, but rather than it being his usual call to action, it was an annoyance.

"Good morning, you guys! It is now 7:00 AM! Rise and shiiiine!"

Ishimaru rolled his eyes at the sound of the bear's grating, chirpy voice.

"Let's make today into the best day it can be!"

_No, thankyou,_ Ishimaru thought. _A best day in your eyes can't be any good for us, now, can it?_

He decided to stay in bed a short while longer. It was justified - he'd gotten to sleep later than he'd wanted to, so the extra time resting would make up for it. Yes, that sounded correct.

But then again, everyone would be expecting him in the cafeteria... oh, screw it. A couple of minutes sans the prefect wouldn't kill them.

* * *

Ishimaru awoke (having fallen asleep without realising) for the second time that morning a few minutes later, to the sound of knocking at his door. He sighed, finally pushing himself to get up.

He wondered for a moment where all his usual motivation had gone.

"Just coming!" he called, disregarding the soundproofed room. He opened up the door to find Asahina, visiting once again.

"Hey, Ishimaru." she greeted, concerned.

"Hello, Asahina. To... to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"

"Well, I, uh, just wanted to ask if you were okay. I mean, you're way late for breakfast, and you're always the first one there. Did you... hear the Monokuma announcement? It's like, 7:20-something."

Ishimaru looked away. "Yes, I-I'm fine though, just tired. I'll be through in a moment, let me just get ready."

"You're sure?"

"Very sure."

"Alrighty. Well... See you in the cafeteria, yeah?"

He nodded in return, and she left, waving, leaving Ishimaru to get ready for breakfast. The memory of the companionship he'd been given the previous night, and the advice from the two visiting girls, pushed him along.

He did get a little caught up in his thoughts along the way, though.

* * *

The cafeteria was almost empty when Ishimaru eventually got there. No wonder - the clock read 7:56. Who would take almost an hour eating breakfast, even with the usual morning discussion?

Naegi, apparently, eating toast. Well, half eating it, half tapping it on the plate and staring into space. He looked up at Ishimaru, eyes widening for a second, when he entered.

"Hey, Ishimaru, you're here! Good to see you finally up."

"Greetings, Naegi."

"Uh, you holding up okay? Asahina told us you weren't doing too good yesterday, and when you didn't turn up this morning... we all kinda got worried. Well, all of us except Fukawa and Togami, of course."

"Y-yes, I'm fine." Ishimaru looked around. "Where is everyone else?"

"Oh, right, yeah. It's, uh, the day after a trial, so they're all exploring the new area upstairs. They were gonna stay and wait for you, but then they didn't know how long you'd be, or if you were coming out at all, so they went ahead and left."

"Oh. Why are you here alone, then?"

"I just wanted breakfast. But of course, of all the times for my 'luck' to act up... or, who knows, maybe it's just 'cause I'm feeling a little messed up right now..." Naegi sighed frustratedly, gesturing to the kitchen. "Long story short, there's about 5 ruined pieces of toast in the trash through there."

"I see..." Ishimaru paused, considering his words. "'Messed up'? What's troubling you?"

"I, uh... can't talk about it right now. I'm not so sure about it."

Ishimaru nodded in understanding as Naegi took another bite of his toast.

"You wanna grab yourself some breakfast? Then we can go check out the new floor after that, I guess."

"Yes, that sounds good."

* * *

"So... mind if I ask what's got you all... like this?" Naegi asked, as the two boys walked through the halls of the 4th floor.

"Like what?" Ishimaru asked in response.

"Y'know, quiet and tired and stuff. Was it because of, uh, Celes' trial? And what she did? I... get what it's like to be framed like that."

"Hmm? Oh, um, no, not quite. I mean, yes, but... not entirely."

"Do you wanna talk about whatever else is on your mind?"

Ishimaru hesitated, unsure of what to say.

"Y-you don't have to," Naegi panicked. "I get that too, there's some stuff where you can't, I'm in that boat right now."

"It's fine." the prefect said resignedly. "I can talk."

"Is it..." The luckster scratched his neck awkwardly. "Is it about-" he said, cut off by Ishimaru speaking before his nerves disappeared.

"Naegi, have you ever... shared a bond with someone? One that you're certain won't be broken, and it makes you feel... on top of the world?"

The other boy clued in quickly. "Uh... yeah, I've had, like, best friends and stuff before."

"Best friends, yes, but..." Ishimaru looked to the ceiling, thinking. "A manly bond, formed through shared experience, in which you've bared your entire beings to one another!"

"...I'm not so sure about that part."

"And you can't help but crave their presence, and his amicable displays of physical affection, and... and you want to return it tenfold, but at the same time, whenever you try, there appears a constricting feeling in your chest, and you admire both for their spirit and also for their... the effort they put into keeping their body healthy, and his violet eyes captivate you like no-one else's can... Have you ever experienced that, Naegi?"

The luckster's face lit up in realisation. "Oh! Well, uh, yeah, I've had crushes before. Just, like, never really on guys." he said, scratching his face. "Can't really relate on that front, but I'd guess it's mostly the same."

"Crush?" Ishimaru questioned, surprised.

"Yeah, I mean, sure sounds like it to me." Naegi paused, then realised the implication in the other boy's words. "H-hold on, you didn't know you had a crush on Mondo?"

"N-no?! I had simply assumed we were particularly special bros!" Ishimaru did a full double take, focusing back on what Naegi had said. "W-wait, you knew I was thinking about Mondo too?! Ugh, first Asahina, now you? How are you people so deductive?!"

"You kind of have to be, in a situation like this. Also, it, uh, was pretty obvious." Naegi let out a nervous chuckle, then sighed. "Man, Ishimaru... I hate to break it to you after the fact of... the second trial... but... yeah, I think you were in love with him. And probably still are, from the looks of things."

Ishimaru's eyes darted about as he processed the new information. In love?! **In love?!**

...He'd been in love with the biker, his first real friend ever, his bro, and he'd been cruelly ripped away from him by fate before he could even realise it.

"I-Ishimaru? Are you okay?"

The prefect didn't respond, simply looking at the floor, backing up against the nearby wall, and sliding down it. He hadn't even realised, hell, he didn't have a single inkling that that might be the case.

Oh _god_ , had Mondo felt the same? Had he hurt Mondo just the same with his inexperience and incompetence with friendships and relationships?

_Maybe it would've been better if Celestia had gone ahead with Yamada's initial suggestion._

"Ishimaru!" Naegi yelled, visibly distressed and crouching down to the other's level. "N-no, you can't think like that! It wouldnt've been better!"

Oh, had he said that out loud? Whoops. Oh, he was crying. A whole lot. And now he was laughing? Why? Why? Why was he laughing when he was so miserable, so distraught, with his vision clouded with tears?

The cruel irony of it all, perhaps.

"Ishimaru? W-wha-... Man, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to... C-come on, let's go finish exploring the floor, yeah?"

He barely noticed Naegi saying anything. He couldn't stop, he didn't know why, he didn't know-

Naegi slapped him.

Ishimaru snapped out of it at that. He looked, shocked, at the other, who gazed back with an equally surprised expression. "Naegi... you..." He rubbed at his cheek, newly red and stinging.

"I-I'm sorry! I didn't know what else to do!"

"It is alright. I understand. Thankyou." God, it hurt. "Let's, um... you suggested finishing our discovery of the new floor, yes? Let's do that."

"You sure you're okay to do it right after all this happened?"

"Positive." Ishimaru affirmed, pushing himself up again. He took a deep breath, then helped Naegi to his feet also.

* * *

The two walked about the halls and new rooms in silence, mostly, with Naegi unsure of what to say, and Ishimaru almost as quiet as he was following Mondo's execution.

Then Ishimaru finally spoke up, a pressing question begging to be asked. "Naegi, do you... think he felt the same way towards me?"

"Oh, uh..." Naegi paused to think. "Honestly, yeah, I do. I think... wherever he is now, he still does."

"Really?" the prefect asked hopefully.

"Really. And... he's there with his brother again, pointing you out, and saying 'That's him! He's great!'... or something."

Ishimaru nodded thoughtfully, holding back tears at the mental image.

"And I think... he wants for you to not give up."

He heard it again. It repeated again.

_" **He'd** want you to **be happy**."_

_" **He'd** want you to **keep going**."_

_" **He** wants for you to **not give up**."_

"T-thankyou... Naegi..." he said, sniffling.

Naegi smiled at him. "No problem, friend."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> somebody stop me  
> almost considered naming this chapter "'that's gay, ishimaru' - naegi" but i've already committed to this chapter name scheme  
> also shoutout to disneyprincesssonia on tumblr for inspiring the fic! look what you've wrought!! (jk genuinely thanks <3)  
> and you can talk to me at my own tumblr @ lollyholly99.tumblr.com


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It happens again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lmao my apologies for this chapter y'all  
> bc it's dumb and also other things whoops  
> enjoy?

"W-what the heck are you saying?! There's no way Sakura is the mole!" Asahina exclaimed, turning to her friend.

"Right, Sakura?"

The fighter said nothing.

"S-Sakura?"

"Furthermore," Monokuma interjected. "I think I'll have Sakura fulfill her 'promise' to me. If she doesn't, I can no longer guarantee what happens with that hostage situation... That's all I wanted to say. I leave the rest to you - do as you please~"

The bear laughed heartily. "Boil or fry, kill or be killed! Upupu, I can't wait!" And with that, he disappeared.

Disbelief swept over the gathered students, each of them voicing their surpise in turn, until Kirigiri spoke.

"What do you have to say, Sakura? If he was lying, just tell us."

Sakura hesitated, silent, then spoke solemnly. "I am sorry... for keeping quiet."

Asahina stepped back, almost knocked down completely by the admission. "W-wha...?"

"You were... really helping the mastermind?!" Ishimaru exclaimed, eyes wide in shock.

Sakura looked away from the 6 pairs of eyes on her. "I am sorry..." she repeated.

"N-no, this isn't right," Asahina turned to the others. "Sakura was being manipulated, I'm sure, she had no choice but to do what the mastermind said..."

"Asahina's right." Naegi piped up. "The mastermind threatened Sakura, she had to do what he said. I saw it!"

As Naegi recounted what he'd seen after Celes' trial, Ishimaru realised: that was why Naegi had seemed off the day after - he'd witnessed a truly troubling thing.

"You agreed to obey him because of a hostage situation, right? But, then, you decided to betray him..."

"So, she's no longer an enemy? We can trust our _dear friend_ forever? Is that what you're saying?" Togami said mockingly. "Stop living in a fairy tale. She helped the mastermind. There's no way we can trust her just like that."

"B-but she betrayed him... she's still our friend, right? We-" Ishimaru remarked, being cut off by Togami pointedly.

"Furthermore, did she even betray the mastermind? It's certainly possible she is only pretending to have done so, and is, in fact, still working against us."

"She wouldn't do that!" Asahina yelled.

Togami looked in Sakura's direction. "If you really betrayed him, why not reveal who he really is?"

After a moment, she spoke again. "I apologise. I do not know."

"Hmm. This just gets more and more suspicious, doesn't it?"

Ishimaru was pained by the whole scene unfolding before him. Sakura was being accused of something awful, just like Mondo, and just like he himself had done, Asahina was denying it, defending her friend despite the admission of guilt, despite all of them knowing it to be true. And like the situation before, he knew denying would do nothing.

"What was that 'promise' that Monokuma was talking about? Did he order you to do something?" Togami pressed on.

"...He ordered me to kill one of you." Sakura admitted.

The words chilled the group to the bone.

"She wouldn't!" Asahina cried. Ishimaru couldn't help but think about how futile her efforts were to convince the others.

"Please, do not fight over me anymore. I... will take full responsibility." Sakura said, her head bowed.

Kirigiri looked at the fighter curiously. "What do you plan to do?"

"I will destroy the mastermind. Even if we both die on eachother's swords, I will fight him, and defeat him."

Asahina's expression grew frightened. "Die on... Wh-what?"

"Asahina... I am sorry for not confiding in you..."

"Huh?"

"I considered it many times, I wished to tell you, but... I was afraid..." Sakura clenched her fists, and looked back up at the swimmer. "...afraid that if I confessed, you would scorn me..."

"S-Sakura...!"

"I apologise..." Just then, Sakura turned and left the gym.

In that moment, Ishimaru saw so much of himself and _him_ in the two athletes, but different. Distorted. Like looking in a funhouse mirror that only brings back painful memories.

**_Ding, dong, ding, dong._ **

Monokuma's face suddenly appeared on the nearby screen, his deceptively cute voice and that constant smile back once again, almost taunting the six students remaining in the room.

"This is a school announcement. It is now 10pm. 'Night Time' begins now. The cafeteria's doors will be locked shortly. You are forbidden to enter it."

The announcemnt faded into static, then the screen turned off, and Togami spoke up.

"Well, I suppose we should get back to our dorms."

"Wait a second!" Asahina protested. "We didn't settle Sakura's case yet!"

Ishimaru couldn't stand seeing her like this anymore. Not his friend. "Asahina, please... stop."

"Wh-what... Ishimaru, I thought you believed in her!"

"There's no point in arguing anymore tonight! You won't change any of their minds!" He met the girl's gaze, pleading with his eyes. Her agitated stance faded away quickly as she realised what he was trying to get across.

"Ishimaru's right." Kirigiri added, moving to stand in the middle of the crowd. "It's no good just standing here arguing. Let's end this, get some rest, and clear our heads. We can continue tomorrow."

Everyone silently agreed, leaving the gym with a heightened sense of distrust spreading amongst them.

* * *

Ishimaru couldn't sleep. Not after that. Not with his friend as troubled as she was right now. And so, he found himself climbing out of bed, making his way to Asahina's room, and knocking at the door. She'd offered support when he'd been similarly distressed - he had to do _something_ in return.

When Asahina opened the door at last, it was obious that she'd been crying - she was red and puffy around the eyes, and the collar of her track jacket was damp in small patches.

"Oh, I-Ishimaru... hey..." She looked almost disappointed to see him. "For a second there, I thought Sakura might have been knocking..."

That explained that disappointment, then.

"Hello, Asahina, I was just... wondering if you were doing alright."

"Not really." She sighed. "I... feel like something bad's gonna happen now, even more than before. I'm... I'm so worried about Sakura, what if..."

She didn't finish the thought. Ishimaru could tell what she meant to say, though. _What if someone kills her over all this?_

Asahina looked down, clenching her fists. "And it's all that damn bear's fault!" With a frustrated grunt, she punched the wall, ignoring the pain that travelled through her as she did so. "The mastermind, he... As if everything wasn't bad enough... I-it didn't have to be Sakura! Why was she forced to be his mole and end up having everybody turn on her?! She doesn't deserve this!"

Ishimaru placed a hand on her shoulder. "I know she doesn't."

It was only a simple gesture to try and comfort her, but it was apparently far more meaningful to Asahina, causing her to start sobbing again as she pulled Ishimaru in for a hug.

"God, Ishimaru... i-it's like no-one else seems to give a damn about her!"

He hugged her back, now on the verge of tears himself. He didn't know what to say.

* * *

Sakura Oogami was dead.

Pale and shaking, Asahina had gathered Ishimaru, Fukawa, and Togami, and brought them to the rec room. And that's where they saw what she, Naegi, and Kirigiri had already seen. The corpse.

Ishimaru was speechless. Sakura, as strong in both body and will as she was, had been killed by someone in that room.

The others were less speechless.

"Oh my... that is certainly a dead body." Fukawa - or Syo, as she was right now - stated.

"I see. So, Sakura Oogami has been killed..." Togami followed.

Ishimaru couldn't believe the two of them. Syo was jovial and mocking as ever. Togami was _smirking_.

"Wh-...you..." he stuttered, turning to them both. "Do you two have _any_ respect?!"

Asahina's shocked face had turned furious. "Of course not! They're the ones who killed her!" she yelled, answering the prefect's question for them.

Togami cocked an eyebrow. "Eh?"

"One of you, at least! You're the only ones who thought of Sakura as an enemy! It has to be one of you!"

"You're so sure of that, even before an investigation?"

"I'm certain... It's obviously one of you two!"

* * *

"...They're mine." Asahina interrupted. "The footprints... are mine."

The courtroom went silent, stunned.

"...You would have found out anyway. It's better if I just confess... isn't it?"

Ishimaru, shaken by the revelation, looked to the girl. "Asahina... you're not saying... t-the one who killed Sakura was..."

"Yeah, that's right..." she paused, taking a deep breath. "I killed Sakura!"

* * *

Naegi looked up at Sakura's portrait. "The person who killed Sakura... is Sakura herself."

* * *

As if the shock of learning about Asahina's plan, learning of her wish to have all of them killed as revenge for pushing Sakura to suicide, and seeing her visible pain when she found out that her efforts would cause Sakura to have died in vain weren't awful enough...

Alter ego had been destroyed. Crushed. Reformed into nothing more than a steel ball with a Monokuma stamp on it.

Ishimaru couldn't help but cry and yell as he watched the face of his friend became that bear's face.

Just as they'd been given new hope in their newfound cameraderie, another spark of their hope was extinguished.

* * *

The next day, the usual post-trial exploration began, of the fifth floor of the school. Ishimaru found Asahina within the dojo, looking wistfully at the surroundings.

"Asahina?" he spoke up, alerting her to his presence.

She tore her eyes away from the room's decorations to look his way. "Oh! Hey, Ishimaru."

"Are you... alright?"

She hesitated. "I don't know. I... I thought I was, after last night, and this morning... We were all able to laugh a little together, we stopped being afraid of eachother... but this room... the cherry blossoms..." The swimmer gestured to the trees she had been looking at, sighing.

Ishimaru watched the petals gently fall for a moment as he realised. "Oh... _Sakura_..."

She nodded, showing him a sad smile. "In the dojo, too, of all places... It's like the mastermind's trying to play some kind of awful joke..."

They sat down on the floor, leaning against one of the trees. There was silence for a short while as they mulled over recent events.

"I'm so sorry." Asahina spoke up finally.

"Pardon?" Ishimaru questioned.

"I mean, for the whole thing yesterday. I... I shouldnt've..." She sighed. "It was so stupid of me to do that."

"Oh. That. Well, I can't say I would have done the same, but... I certainly understand."

Asahina hummed. "...Yeah, I almost forgot, we've both been through the same kind of thing."

Ishimaru nodded quietly, words escaping him.

"Y'know, when I was planning to, uh, fake who killed her, I felt the worst about getting you... involved."

_Executed._

"I mean, you've been nothing but supportive since Monokuma gave us that last 'motive'. Even with all the stuff you've been dealing with. And, honestly, I can't thank you enough for that. Or apologise enough to you, or any of the others, for what I almost did."

"It's... It's quite alright, Asahina." Ishimaru finally spoke.

"Thankyou." The swimmer replied. She leaned her head on his shoulder and trained her eyes on the falling petals once more. "God, I wonder what Sakura would think about all this."

He thought hard on what to say.

"She would... want you to be happy, mostly. Right?"

She looked to the prefect with a smile again, tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"R-right."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> chapter alternatively titled: "lolly uses too many scenes straight from the hecking game while only adding a lil bit of Ishi goodness bc she just can't help it"  
> also "lolly uses too many damn ellipses"  
> man this one was kinda tough to write? mostly bc i was trying to figure out the logistics of how Sakura's trial would go without Hagakure and them bottles and I had a whole idea of Ishida coming around again and basically taking his place but then i fuckin. aaaaagghh. so i just scrapped it all and skipped to the Most important bits of that trial and i'm hoping this wasn't a big ol mistake lmao  
> also i feel like i'm making these guys more and more ooc as this goes along?  
> oh well  
> screm w/ me at my tumblr @ lollyholly99.tumblr.com I am a sad and lonely child


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Freedom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i need to sleep  
> also this is dumb  
> <3 enjoy

" **You mustn't lose hope!** "

Naegi's words hit Ishimaru like a bullet. They stirred something within him, forcing him to fight through the despair he felt.

"Come on, the Ishimaru I know wouldn't give in like this! Are you just gonna let all that hard work getting to this point, and the lives of our friends, go to waste? Where's the moral compass who wanted to guide us all when this whole thing began?!"

Ishimaru shook his head, as if physically shaking away the despairing thoughts, and gave Naegi a determined look to mirror the other boy's.

"Right here!" he said, resolutely. "Don't worry, I... I won't let you down! Not you, or any of us here, or anyone we've lost!"

_**Keep going.** _

He walked over to stand beside Naegi, reaffirming his support. "Don't you let us down either!"

Naegi nodded at him in a silent promise, then turned to Asahina to inspire her next.

* * *

It was all over. Junko Enoshima was dead. The key to leaving this god-forsaken school was right in Naegi's hands. Soon, the giant titanium door that kept them all caged in would be open, and they would be free. Whatever awaited them outside of the school walls was finally in their reach.

But first, they had to stop standing around in silence as they were and do something.

"We should get going." Kirigiri piped up. "Naegi, would you make the preparations, please?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah, sure." Naegi responded, reaching into his hoodie pocket.

Ishimaru paid little attention to the conversation that occurred around him, caught up in his own mind yet again. Any other time and he'd be asking himself how he'd become so much less on-the-ball than his previous self, but the idea currently being presented to him was... almost surreal. They'd be free, at last, just like they'd been dreaming of for weeks (had it really only been that short an amount of time?), but at the cost of so many friends.

He wished that _he_... _they_... could've been here for this.

The prefect was brought away from his own thoughts by the feeling of a hand on his shoulder. Asahina's hand, specifically.

"Hey, you ready to go?"

He took a deep breath, then nodded. "Yes. Very."

"I... I guess we're saying goodbye, huh?" Asahina said, looking up to the door.

Ishimaru cocked his head. "Hmm?"

"I mean... Y'know, Sakura. And Mondo. We're gonna be saying goodbye together, right?"

"Oh. Yes."

"With smiles though, yeah? We're only gonna remember the good times with them, from now on."

_**Be happy.** _

"Yes. Absolutely!" he replied enthusiastically - more than he had been able to in what felt like a long, long time.

Everyone's conversations slowly died down, until the six students faced the door once again. Naegi flipped open the lid of the escape button, readied himself to press it, and took a deep breath.

"Well, here goes...!"

He pressed down on the button, and with flashing lights and a wailing siren, the machine guns retracted, and the door finally opened. Beyond the door appeared a near-blinding light, obscuring in that moment what lay outside the school. But to them, it was a light of hope.

* * *

The ultimate biker and the ultimate prefect seemed to be the least likely of friends amongst Hope's Peak's 78th class, and yet, somehow, in the relatively short time they'd attended the school, they had become almost inseparable.

They had headed out together after their last class for the day, having planned, at Ishimaru's suggestion, to get some studying done in his dorm room. Or, rather, Ishimaru would study diligently, and Mondo wouldn't do too much at all, really. Ishimaru didn't mind - Mondo's presence was enjoyable enough to more than make up for any annoyance he would've felt at the other's aloofness towards his school career. In the meantime, he'd study enough for two people.

The two were sat on Ishimaru's bed, with Ishimaru at the foot, taking notes from various textbooks, and Mondo laying further back, feeling like he could fall asleep with how comfortable he was getting. As was common for the two.

What wasn't so common, however, was the quietness of the room.

Ishimaru hadn't noticed, focusing hard on his work, but Mondo did. And he wasn't fond of how it had come about, being too lost in his thoughts to converse with his friend. He shook himself out of it and shuffled forward, looking over the other boy's shoulder.

The prefect did take note of that, looking back at the biker. "Oh, bro, have you finally decided to get some studying done?" he asked jovially, knowing it certainly wasn't the case.

"Nah," Mondo responded. "Was just lookin' at all this and remembered how damn hard ya work. 'S kinda incredible."

"Of course! As a student, I need to put one hundred percent into studying!" 

_Incredible and cute_ , Mondo thought for a moment, before pushing the words out of his mind.

"Well, just don't go pushin' yourself too far, yeah? I don't want anythin' bad happenin' to ya just for grades."

Ishimaru hesitated for a second, the conflict inside him from Mondo's words visible on his face.

"C'mon, bro, I know it's super important to ya, but ya gotta take care of yourself first." Mondo pressed.

Ishimaru sighed. "Yes. Okay."

"Nice."

Mondo lay back again, feeling more at peace knowing at least some kind of conversation had been started. And one to ensure his best friend wouldn't end up killing himself over his talent, or something. He couldn't help but feel that that had come out of nowhere, though...

All these thoughts as of late - could it have been... no, of course not, he liked girls! And he was his bro! No way...

"Ah, shit."

"Hmm? Mondo? Did you say something?" Ishimaru said, loooking back at the other.

He hadn't meant to say anything out loud. "Oh, nah, nothin'. Don't worry." The biker waved his hand dismissively.

The prefect went back to his studies, and Mondo watched him for a moment. No, there was no way. At all.

_But what if there was?_

_But there's not!_

_Fuck, there might be._

"Hey, bro?" Mondo piped up after some time, his gaze unmoving from the ceiling, and his leg bouncing incessantly - god, would it just stop?!

"Yes, Mondo?"

"Shit, I... I think I like ya, man." He could practically feel his face burning up as he admitted it to not only his friend, but himself, too.

Ishimaru blinked at him momentarily, then turned back to his work. "I should hope so - I mean, we wouldn't be friends if we didn't like eachother, right?"

Mondo sat up and sighed exasperatedly. "No, I mean - fuck - like, I'm in love with ya, Ish."

Ishimaru dropped his pen in surprise as the words registered in his head. A couple of seconds later, and he broke the silence that had formed between them.

"O-oh."

Mondo braced himself for further comments from the other boy, uncrossing his leg from the other to stop that _goddamn bouncing and god it's only getting worse-_

But Ishimaru didn't say anything.

"I-I mean," the biker backtracked, looking anywhere but in the prefect's direction. "I didn't mean to make ya uncomfortable, I don't even know about it, I just had to get this shit off my chest before-"

"N-no, Mondo, please, it's fine. I just... had thought I was the only one who felt that way." Ishimaru took a deep breath, steadying himself. "I think I like you too."

"Oh _thank fuck_ for that." Mondo sighed, relieved.

"So... what now?" Ishimaru asked. "I'm sorry to say I'm not quite... experienced in this area."

Mondo thought for a moment. "Uh... mind if I try somethin'?"

Ishimaru nodded.

Mondo moved before he could think too hard on it, kissing the other boy on the cheek and taking both of them by surprise.

* * *

The ride to the Future Foundation's headquarters was quiet. The big discussions would wait until they'd gotten there.

All of a sudden, Ishimaru felt... something...

Without realising he was doing so, he reached up to touch his cheek, looking at the floor, face scrunched up as he thought hard.

"Hey, Ishimaru? You alright?" Asahina asked from the seat next to him.

"Yes, I..." He paused, trying to recall something or other.

"I just felt like something was missing for a second there."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> aaaand we're all done! I rly had fun writing this one (apart from the times i listened to the part of me that was screaming "they're all way ooc you little shit!!!!")! I hope y'all enjoyed reading this fic as much as I did writing it!  
> maybe I'll write some happy ishimondo now that I've gotten my fill of angst haha. but first i'm gonna be terrible and go back to skeletons lmao.  
> feel free to stab me over any feels caused. I take full responsibility.  
> and feel free to _threaten_ to stab me for the feels over at lollyholly99.tumblr.com! :D  
> anyways yeah love y'all byee <3


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